Saturday, November 29, 2008

10 Terrible Movies

After a weekend of self-subjecting myself to not-so-great acting.. I thought I'd force my opinion on you all...

1. The Happening -- Stupidest plot of any movie I have ever seen.

2. Dumber & Dumberer -- I remember literally considering asking for my money back. It is the worst sequel, or prequel of all time.

3. Mannequin -- Just think about it, and you'll realize how dumb this movie was.

4. Beaches -- First of all, it's Bette Midler. Secondly it's just a really dumb movie.

5. Problem Child -- A child with discipline problems wins over all our hearts.. No, he does not!

6. Look Who's Talking Too -- Baby's talking shouldn't have been the plot for one movie...much less two. Both movies could easily be on this list.

7. Howard The Duck -- I know too many people that will defend this movie as if it were almost watchable.

8. Dirty Dancing/Footloose -- Or any other dance movie ever made.

9. Drumline -- Or any other music battle movie ever made.

10. The Neverending Story -- I think I only hate this movie because we were forced to watch it anytime a teacher was too lazy to teach in elementary school.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Aaron Confessions

Confessions from deep in my mind...

* I have been playing the guitar for 15 years. I still don't know what I'm doing on that thing.

* I have more than one tv. I don't watch either of them.

* John McCain would not have been a very good President.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Cutest Animal Ever?

I am not necessarily a cat lover. But this is pretty friggin cute. I watched the whole video. It was a nice way to forget my day for 3 minutes especially at 2:22 into the video when he meows....


Okay..back to dumb and lazy posts.

Monday, November 24, 2008

A Couple Of Observations

* Only in America could you purchase a food served in a dish that is also a food. i.e. soup in a bread bowl. or my new favorite.. eggs on a bacon plate with a fork made out of sausage..

* People care about how chickens are housed before they are slaughtered. I too want them to live in a fully furnished townhouse suite just before I violently chop off their head.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

...And This Site Rolls On

The economy falls.. empires come and go.. But TLAT rolls on!

Just so everyone knows... I am coming up on my 4th year of doing this blog. My visitors comes and go. It's a roller coaster. But I don't care. My staff and I have made a commitment to blog almost daily...and that promise we will keep. Thanks for reading everyone.. Keep coming back!

Sincerely,

TLAT Writing Staff

Attn: Due to economic turmoil we are laying off all of the TLAT staff except for Aaron effective immediately.

Friday, November 21, 2008

In an Absolut World, Everyone Would be Welcomed Home

What if 20 people picked a stranger at random and greeted them at the airport with posters, flowers, balloons, and a 10-foot wide banner reading, “Welcome Back.”...
Another great original prank from improveverywhere.com

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Fun Facts

* Somali pirates are terrorizing ships off the coast of Africa. But instead of having parrots on their shoulders ruling the seven seas looking for ye booty... These pirates are saying phrases like "Rrrrrr matey... Allah be saying for you to give me yer stuff."

* I watch COPS sometimes and wonder where is MY torn wife beater shirt, where is MY old water heater laying in the yard, where is MY crack pipe that I can throw in the bushes when they start chasing me? I want my piece of the American dream!

* Socialism is going to be great under Obama! I mean the government takes over a quarter of my money now.. I can't WAIT to give even more to jobless deadbeats!

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Monday, November 17, 2008

1940's Color Photograhs

A marketplace in Lincoln, NE, 1942...

A marketplace in Washington D.C. in 1941..

Here is a color photo from October 1942 in Kansas City, KS of B-25 bombers in production....

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Thursday, November 13, 2008

TLAT Wisdom

(rerun)

Here's some everyday advice for the rest of you. Just things I've picked up along the way...

* If you are in charge of the music that plays over the speakers in a business establishment and you use your Ipod to make a playlist that is appropriate listening...Make sure that you double check the playlist so that you didn't accidentally add an unknown song to the playlist. There is nothing more embarrassing then trying to sell a vacuum to an elderly lady and out of nowhere "Baby Got Back" by Sir-Mix-A-Lot comes blaring over the loud speakers.

* When eating a muffin...Remember that muffins are crumbly and that you need to keep track of where the crumbs land. It's not good when you go to greet your friends, your boss, a customer, or the President Of The United States Of America, and a chunk of blueberry muffin is dangling from your chin.

* Be sure that you know what your skills are. Don't tell people you can play the xylophone if you've only tried it once...someday someone is going to call you on it, and the next thing you know you are 3rd chair xylophonist for the New York Philharmonic and you have no clue what you are doing.

* Parents... Not every kid is going to be a concert pianist. If your child hates piano lessons let the child quit. If you don't they will end up hating the piano AND you....instead of just you.

* If you are out in an abandoned mine shaft or an empty amusement park and you see a gang of teenage mystery solvers and their talking dog looking for clues...leave them alone, that's important work they're doing.

Sunday, November 09, 2008

Greatest Song Of All Time?

When they hit that chorus just feel the tingle go up your spine!

Saturday, November 08, 2008

Things I Want To Do Before I Die...

* Ride with Barack Obama down the beach on a bicycle built for two.

* Call Richard Simmons and tell him there is a 2 for 1 sale on sparkly short shorts at Target. Then hide in a clothes rack and laugh at how disappointed he gets when he finds out they are still regular price.

* Go to the symphony wearing a sombrero and sit on the front row. Shout "Ole'" after each movement.

* Learn to love again.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

The Lord Put Him There.. Let's Respect Him


I mean he is going to pay my mortgage and put gas in my car.. So I guess I shouldn't complain!

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Monday, November 03, 2008

Good Advice

* You are never too old to go down the slide at the park.

* Understanding women is a difficult task. Just try and do what they tell you to do as much as you can. When that eventually fails run into the woods and hide.

* Never give your mother a biography of Ed Gein for Mother's day.

* Make sure to blame George W. Bush for the fact that you are a raging alcoholic.

* Wear your heart on your sleeve... Wear your liver on your pant leg.

Sunday, November 02, 2008

Why I Am A Consrvative Republican...

You libs out there that "love" your country and are voting for Obama.... Watch. Listen. Learn.


AMEN!

I love this guy!